RESENTMENT

Recently we have been looking at the PROCESS we go through with our emotions when we live with an alcohol abuser - here it is again:
DISBELIEF > DENIAL > ANGER > BITTERNESS > RESENTMENT > SADNESS >  COMPASSION > FORGIVENESS > LOVE.

So now we will look at BITTERNESS and RESENTMENT as part of the feelings we go through.

After our ANGER subsides somewhat, we often find we are feeling BITTER - we may have thoughts like:

• Why ME?
• What have I done to deserve this?
• It's his/her fault we are in this mess!
• I hate this situation I'm in.

Most often this morphs into RESENTMENT - and we may think:

• I hate it when he/she drinks
• Our life is going down the toilet
• I wish I was with someone else
• He/she is damaging our life
• And so on  - WE  HOLD  A  GRUDGE  AGAINST  OUR  DRINKER

This is what happens to most of us. We feel resentful.

Problem is - negative feelings like Resentment, if held long enough, can start to cause us physiological problems - our body will be affected - our health will suffer - this is well understood now.

SO  HOW  DO  WE  LOSE  OUR  RESENTMENT?

The answer to Resentment is ---- FORGIVENESS!

HOW can we FORGIVE what our drinker is doing to us??

BY UNDERSTANDING that alcohol abuse is an ILLNESS.   The WORLD  HEALTH  AUTHORITY  RECOGNIZES  ALCOHOLISM  AS  A  DISEASE.

A DISEASE OF THE MIND..... you may have trouble accepting this for a while, so if you do not want to take my word for it. do some reading.

So if it IS  a DISEASE, we can feel some COMPASSION for the plight our drinker is in.

Have a look at a previous post of mine on July 8 2013 entitled: HOW  DO  I  DEAL  WITH  MY  RESENTMENT?|

Read that and see if you can begin to feel some compassion,  the drinker is not doing this to hurt you - they are in the grip of a powerful mental condition.

Do some research for yourself.  Try to feel some understanding and compassion for your drinker.

It's not their fault they cannot handle alcohol - its a medical condition.