GETTING HELP

Last time I talked about the PROCESS we seem to go through when living with an alcohol abuser - and to recap, this was:

DISBELIEF > DENIAL > ANGER > BITTERNESS > RESENTMENT > SADNESS >  COMPASSION > FORGIVENESS > LOVE.

That's what we seem to have to work through - there don't seem to be any shortcuts: we don't seem to able to move from ANGER for instance right through to FORGIVENESS without spending time with the feelings in between.

But this time I'd like to talk about being stuck in the stages of DISBELIEF  or  DENIAL.

This is where we first start out when confronted with our loved one being drunk most of the time.  Its too hard to accept what is going on: we don't want to know about it; we wish it would just go away.

But it goes on.  And we begin to feel angry, and the anger will grow, fuelled by our frustration.

Its right about this stage we should look for help - because the coming anger will do us and those around us a lot of harm.  It would be much better to reach out for help:

 ............ AS SOON AS WE CAN ACCEPT THE REALITY OF THE DRINKING.

The sooner we ACCEPT there is a PROBLEM in our lives, the sooner we can reach out for help.

I reached out to AL-ANON  FAMILY  GROUPS  for help - I found out where the  nearest meeting was and went to that.  I started to feel better because there I found people who had suffered just like I was now doing - and they had found peace in their lives through the Al-Anon program.

So message for today is:  ACCEPT  you have a problem > REACH OUT FOR HELP.

Check out the HELP PAGES to see how I found help.