When we first realise, with our stomach crashing to the floor, that we have a REAL problem with our loved one - because they have obviously lost control of their drinking - often we DO NOT WANT TO FACE IT.
We may try every justification to avoid the truth: in my case I convinced myself that my wife was depressed, and that if I could help her get to the bottom of what was worrying her, well, then she would stop drinking, wouldn't she?
WRONG.
I was just in DENIAL that we had a serious problem. I could NOT admit the shame and helplessness that admitting defeat would bring. I tried not to see the reality. I was in DENIAL.
Problem is, as long as we do not accept the truth and reality of our situation, we don't seek help.
And so we just plough along, doing what we've always done, so we get what we always got.
Meanwhile our beloved drinker steadily gets more and more under the control of alcohol. The drinking get worse and bad things start to happen.
One of the most important steps we can take is to ADMIT WE HAVE A PROBLEM - with alcohol abuse, in our family.
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